Two words command every type of relationship. In his book Love & Respect, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs mentions that every woman has a deep need for unconditional love and every man has a deep need for unconditional respect. He goes on to say that communication between men and women is often frustrating because we perceive love differently. But how does this apply to our business? And what about loving and respecting ourselves? There’s a simple way to tell whether we’re truly loving and respecting ourselves and others: Look at our calendar.
In my career, I’ve seen too many businesses fail and families break apart because of the way they prioritize their time. In FranklinCovey’s YouTube video Big Rocks (www.youtube.com/watch?v=zV3gMTOEWt8), Stephen Covey illustrates the importance of time management through a simple exercise where he shows the audience that time robbers (e-mail, social media, television, etc.) can literally rob us of quality time with ourselves and others.
So, why is this important? When was the last time someone told you, “I’ve been trying to tell you, but you’re too busy to listen”? What if that someone was your employee? Or your own child? Or even your spouse, partner, or friend? What’s taking time away from what truly matters to you, and what should you do about it?
Here’s a simple exercise you can do to bring back love and respect for yourself and others around you by focusing on your “big rocks” (the most important things in your life) first:
• Make a list of what’s most important to you
• Prioritize based on the following chart:
• Now you’re ready to put each activity in order of priority, listing the activities in Quadrant I first. Here are some examples of activities to include in each quadrant:
1. Quadrant I: Crises; important issues with a tight timeline
2. Quadrant II: Planning; relationship building; quality time with ourselves, family, and employees
4. Quadrant III: Distractions; interruptions; unimportant activities
5. Quadrant IV: Time robbers; some mail; some calls
Share this graph with your team, spouse, partner, or friend – this is the best way to keep yourself accountable
Revisit it monthly to make sure you stay on track
As you know, during the safety demonstration of any airline flight, the flight attendant will state, “Put your oxygen mask on first.” When organizing your calendar, make sure you take time out for yourself first so you can plan, think, and make better decisions.
And always remember: “Put your big rocks in first.”
Dr. Betty Uribe is Executive Vice President of California Bank & Trust
“Love and Respect” © Dr. Betty Uribe February, 2018